LAREDO, TX - Today, Laredoans awoke to a mysterious cold, white substance that blanketed most homes, vehicles, and lawns.
City officials haven't confirmed the origin of the mysterious substance, but a number of citizens claim to have seen it fall from the sky late last night.
“We are working with the City of Laredo Health Department and local scientists to determine the nature of this substance. In the meantime, we advise citizens to remain indoors until we can confirm that exposure to the substance will not result in personal harm” an LPD spokesperson told our reporters.
“Oh, it’s totally safe,” Mr. Smith told us as he molded some of the substance into a ball and gently tossed it at his 4-year-old son. He and his family of four recently moved into Laredo. “We see this up north all the time, it’s totally safe.”
Still, the Mayor’s office advices Laredoans to navigate around the mysterious substance with extreme caution.